Positive Reflections

Peeking in your inner self

There is a kid in each one of us 🙂 just need to let it free

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What are your values?

People are different based on their values. A higher order value always takes precedence over a lower order value. If you place one value higher than another, and you have to choose between doing one thing or doing another, you will always select the action that is consistent with your higher value. Once you are clear about your order of values, decision making becomes much easier. Think about it. What are your real values?

But more importantly, how can you determine what your values really are? Simple. Just observe your behaviors, especially the things you do when you are under pressure. Your values are always expressed in your actions. It is not what you say, or wish, or hope, or intend that expresses your true values. It is only what you do.

If you want to know what your values are at this moment, you can examine your recent past and notice the choices you made when you could have gone one way or another. Your choices, and your subsequent actions, demonstrated to yourself and others what was of greatest value and importance to you.

Compare Different People

Here is an example. Imagine you have two people who have the same three values. The values are family, health and career success. The only difference between these two people is the order of importance that they placed on these values, their priorities. The first person, Raj, says that, “My family comes first, my health is second and career success is third.”

Jay, on the other hand, has the same values, but he says, “Career success comes first for me, then my family, and then my health.”

Determine the Difference

Would there be a difference in character and personality between these two people? Would there be a small difference or a large difference? Which of these two people would you like to get to know and become friends with? Would you be able to tell these two people apart in conversation? Which one do you think you would like and trust more?

Values Set People Apart

The answers to these questions are clear. The person with the higher values in a better order of priority will invariably be a better person than the person whose values are in a different order. Your choice of values determines the quality of your character. When you select values such as integrity, love, courage, honesty, excellence or responsibility, and you live your life consistent with those values, every hour of every day, you actually become a superior person. It is your values that determine the kind of person you really are.

Action Exercises

Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.

First, think about how you behave, how you choose, whenever you are under pressure. Remember, it is only what you do, your actions, that tell who you really are.

Second, observe how other people around you behave when they are forced to choose. You will only be compatible with people whose values are similar to yours. What are they?

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Neutralize worry situations…

Do you find yourself constantly organizing your life and working to minimize surprises and problems, but can never seem to stay one step ahead? In spite of your best efforts, this is not always possible.Are you already facing a fear- or worry-inducing situation? Don’t panic. Here are the four steps of what we refer to as the “worry buster.

“Clarity is EverythingStep Number One: Define the worry situation clearly in writing – fully half of all problems can be solved just by clearly defining them. Remember, “Accurate diagnosis is half the cure.”

Determine the WorstStep Number Two: Determine the worst possible outcome of the situation. What is the absolute worst that can happen?

Be Willing to Have it SoStep Number Three: Resolve to accept the worst should it occur. The first step in dealing with any negative situation is to be willing to have it so. Once you resolve to accept the worst, your mind will become calm and clear and you’ll be ready to take some constructive action?

Take ActionStep Number Four: The final step is to immediately begin doing everything you possibly can to improve upon the worst.The Real Antidote to WorryRemember, worry is merely a sustained form of fear caused by indecision. The only real antidote to worry is purposeful action. Get so busy doing something about your situation that you don’t have time to worry. As you take action, your confidence, courage and sense of control will return and wipe away your fears.

Action ExercisesHere are two things you can do to get rid of your worries:First, make a list, down one side of a page, of all the situations causing you any stress or worry at the moment.Second, on the other side of the page, write out the worst possible thing that could happen as a result. You’ll be amazed to see much of your worry disappear with this exercise.

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Farmer & Donkey

One day a farmer’s donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn’t worth it to retrieve the donkey.

He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone’s amazement he quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up.

As the farmer’s neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!

MORAL :
Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred – Forgive.

2. Free your mind from worries – Most never happens.

3. Live simply and appreciate what you have.

4. Give more.

5. Expect less from people but more from yourself.

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One of the Strategies of life!!!

One of the Strategies of life!!! – Video Link

In Hindi we popularly say – “Bakra Fasana”

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Anything is possible… Just believe it!!!

https://www.facebook.com/video/embed?video_id=377244189041061

 

 

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Einstein’s Formula for Success

Albert Einstein had a formula for success. Can you believe that? One of the greatest minds of all time developed a math formula for success! I suggest you read this carefully—this may be the most important math equation you will ever see.

Einstein said, “If A equals success, then the formula is: A=X+Y+Z. X is work. Y is play.

Z is keep your mouth shut.”

Einstein no doubt had an excellent sense of humor. Let’s look at the 3 variables in this equation. They are:

1. Work 2. Play 3. Keeping your mouth shut!

1. Work: Albert Einstein had a tremendous work ethic and because of that gave more to society and modern science than any person in recent times.

2. Play: Einstein, however, did not work 24 hours a day and made time for fun and relaxation. His idea of fun may have been different than yours, but that doesn’t mean it still wasn’t play.

3. Keeping your mouth shut: Finally, my favorite part of his success formal is to keep your mouth shut. I genuinely believe that the person who talks the least says the most. A friend of mine complains that the woman he is dating talks too much. I don’t know how to break the news to him; the problem is not that she talks too much. It simply is the fact that he is irritated that he isn’t able to talk. Now, let me just say this is not a generic man and woman statement. I am speaking about a specific person I know. His desire is to constantly talk and because he likes to talk so much, he will talk in circles. If you let him talk long enough he will repeat the same thing three times and then contradict himself. His desire is not to hear but to be heard.

Albert Einstein, on the other hand, had nothing to prove. He felt no need to be the “Chatty Cathy” he could have been with his knowledge. It wasn’t important to him to talk to everyone he met and talk over their heads to demonstrate his IQ. Instead, he learned the value of quietness and solitude.
Shift your mindset from being a talker to a listener. It has been said that you can make more friends in five minutes by becoming interested in others than you can make in five years of trying to get others interested in you! How do you become interested in others? You ask questions and then keep your mouth shut!

Dale Carnegie wrote the best-selling book How to Win Friends and Influence People. One of the key premises of this book was that everyone’s favorite subject is actually themselves and that the sweetest sound to their ears is the sound of their own name. Einstein knew this and realized he could influence others by choosing his spots to speak and validating others by extending them the courtesy of listening.

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Decisions !!! How are they taken?

Life is full of cruel realities, which in every walk of life confronts us. We being part of the viscous cycle are unavoidably subjected to these realities.

Here is the twist in tail, we all are exposed to same realities but our perceptions are varied. Unlike, ‘Glass is half empty or half filled’ – there are multiple metaphors to the picture our eyes see (reads). Ahead of all lies the reasoning based on our past – life experiences, upbringing, society, and the list can go on.

This simple process of perceptions leads to interpretations and decisions in life.

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Living Life On The Surface

In an ideal situation, the thoughts that run in my mind, should be exactly those that I would like and I want. We do exert this control, that we possess, over our thoughts, but it is not complete and it is only sometimes. The more we become completely engrossed in our daily routine, the more our thoughts tend to become reactions to what goes on outside us. That’s when they go out of control and our lives move in an unfocused way. As a result things don’t work out as we might have desired. Then we develop a habit of blaming other people and circumstances, or we justify our pain by telling ourselves we are not very worthy or powerful enough. Often, these two inner strategies go together. The trouble is, both are cover ups, preventing us from going for a long-term solution.

In this way, we tend to live our lives on a very superficial level, without taking the time to find the solution to what is going on wrong inside. Deeper difficulties remain hidden inside. I move from one scene of life to another – eating, watching television, studying in college, getting married, changing jobs, buying a new car or house, etc. without ever stopping. All these are part of living, but if I make them my whole and sole, my foundation, it’s as if I skate across the surface of life without being in touch with the core. As time progresses, an inner shallowness develops. Then the feeling keeps growing inside that ‘there must be more to life than this’. I then, find that my relationships are not working out as I would have hoped and they are lacking in depth.

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The Circle Of Influence And Worry

Make a list of the things that worry you most and decide if they are in your circle of influence or worry. Think about what you can really do to have an influence on each of them in an effective way. By determining which of these two circles is the centre around which most of your time and energy revolves, you can discover a great deal about your level of positivity. Positive people focus on the things they can do something about. If necessary, they change their attitude. They are aware that perhaps they cannot change the circumstances but they can improve their inner attitude. This is what positive focusing is all about: being creative, thinking differently, being open to listening, being more understanding, more communicative and showing more solidarity.Reactive people focus on the problems of the circle and on the circumstances about which they have no control. They react to the defects found in other people. From this worrying, accusations, destructive criticism, feelings of blame, a reactive language and feelings of weakness and frustration can arise. They want others or the circumstances to change first and when that happens, then they will change. Whenever they think that the problem is on the outside, this thought is the problem. The negative energy produced as a result of this approach, combined with the lack of attention to the areas in which they could do something to improve the situation, means that the area of influence decreases in size. They give power to what is external so that it dominates them. In other words they think that change must come from “outside towards the inside”; they think that something that is outside must change before they themselves change.

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